Thursday, April 15, 2010

The Fall of LaTroy

This is an ODE exclusive. We caught up with Brewers RP LaTroy Hawkins for a post-game interview following the Brewers 7-6 loss to the Cubs.

ODE: LaTroy, it's great to get a chance to talk with you. Welcome to the Brewers.LaTroy Hawkins: Thanks for talking with me guys. It's great to be a part of this ball club.

ODE: Tough loss for the Crew today. What happened out there?

Hawkins: Yeah. I pretty much lost that game for us today. I wish I could blame it on my bleeding rectum or diarrhea or something. But honestly, I think what you saw out there was I'm not a very good baseball player.

ODE: You are no stranger to pitching poorly at Wrigley. Why do you think you struggle there so much?

Hawkins: Well, like I said, I'm a horrible pitcher. Sometimes I get lucky, like in my outings earlier this season. What's the saying? Even a blind squirrel finds a nut some of the time? As an ex-Cub, I've pitched a lot at Wrigley. I think it makes sense that if a bad player plays in a particular ball club's stadium with some frequency, you'll see some bad outings there.

ODE: So what's the take away from this loss? For you, and for the Brewers in this young campaign?

Hawkins: Well, anytime you send a shitty player out there you're putting your team in a position to lose. So for the Brewers, I think today is kinda a wake up call. If they want to win games, they should avoid calling my number, no matter the size of the lead. For me, huh. I've got 3.25 million reasons not to get too rattled by this. I mean, I've been a bad pitcher for awhile now and teams still keep seeing my upside.

ODE: How do you shake this one off and go back out and pitch well?

Hawkins: I'm fiendin' to catch up with my old girl I used to bone when I was here with the Cubs. She takes care of me real good. Sucks on my balls, lets me skeet on her face. I figure a night in her ass will do the trick.

ODE: Great talking with you LaTroy. Thanks for meeting with us.

Hawkins: Hey, no problem guys.

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